#satire

We all need to transition to this way of cooking, because clearly this is where the future is going. I expect in a few short years kitchens will be much smaller. Gone will be stoves and ovens and flat tops. Restaurant kitchens will only be a small closet with a microwave. I predict this will happen by 1955 at the latest.

Today we struck a blow for religious freedom in the great state of Mississippi. For too long our children have been unprotected against the nefarious teachings of Richard Dawkins. I have personally talked to many concerned parents who said that they were horrified when their children told them that God was a delusion or that human beings are simply carbon-based robots who took orders from the D-N-A. This law puts the end of that nonsense now. Let's pray that Mississippi will be a beacon of hope for the rest of our Christian nation.

Problem is, there is no “Jeremy.” The quote was from a satirical piece by columnist Mark Schatzker, entitled “Occupy Toronto: The one-week anniversary party.” Above that headline was the word, “Satire.”

"Senate hopeful Sue Lowden’s plan for Healthcare reform is to barter chickens for medical procedures. But you may be unsure how many chickens are required for your medical care. This handy calculator converts many common procedures into chickens so you won’t look like an idiot at your next Doctor’s Appointment. "

"Do you contribute something worthwhile to the marketplace of ideas, or are you just a noisy asshat? Here’s one way to tell: how do you act when you are proven wrong about something? Do you learn from the experience and admit you were wrong — or do you double down?"

"I recently published a novel, and now it’s time to get back to work. If you’re anything like me, figuring out what to write next can be a real hassle. A flashy and experimental brain-bender, or a pointillist examination of the dissolution of a typical American family? ­Generation-spanning door-stopper or claustrophobic psychological sketch? Buncha novellas with a minor character in common? To make things easier, I modified my dartboard a few years ago. Now, when I’m overwhelmed by the untold stories out there, I head down to the basement, throw a dart and see where it lands. Try it for yourself!"

"no significant difference between the groups in thinking Colbert was funny, but conservatives were more likely to report that Colbert only pretends to be joking and genuinely meant what he said while liberals were more likely to report that Colbert used satire and was not serious when offering political statements."

"Child Trader Child Exchange Network isn’t about not loving your children. Its about finding a family that can love them more."

'anything short of Downs would officially make you the worst Plinko player in the history of "The Price Is Right"!'

"The Pig and the Box is about a pig who finds a magic box that can replicate anything you put into it. "

The State of the Union address you didn't see! (Smile, it's satire.)