#sports

Hyaluronic acid, which is not banned in sport, can be used to increase penis circumference by one or two centimetres. This would increase the surface area of their suits during competition, which, according to FIS, the international ski and snowboard federation, could increase their flight in the air.

One week, George came in and typed up his piece, dropped it at the editor's desk, and went off into the night. The editor looked at the copy and it was utter gibberish. Lots of consonants. Remembering that George was a touch-typist, the editor took the piece, put his hands on the keyboard, but moved them one key to the side. The piece was perfect, except George had started one key over

Back in the real world, at Legends, StarCraft fans continued to trickle in. We had the whole main floor to ourselves, and it finally started to fill up late in the afternoon, but "real" sports fans vastly outnumbered us for most of the day. Just after the soccer fans finally chilled out, some NY Giants fans congregated in the balcony and proceeded to be real jerks about it; one jersey-clad fan stood and pointed at us from above, as if we were a curiosity in a zoo. In a particularly tense moment, where the football fans started yelling irrationally at their own screens, StarCraft fans started chanting "MLG! MLG! MLG! MLG!," as if that would quiet the opposition.

That rabbits like to hop is hardly a secret. But now European rabbit enthusiasts have harnessed their bunnies' natural talents to create a new spectator sport... rabbit showjumping.

Wow. Surfboard + public pond + bundle of dynamite = Urban surfing. So close to a Darwin award...

"There are leagues, coaches, pep talks, uniforms, corporate sponsors, loyal fans and spectators perched in stadium-style seating."

"If the andro that helped McGwire hit 70 home runs in 1998 was an unnatural, game-altering enhancement, what about his high-powered contact lenses?"

"Get it put back in, and soon."

"I will never mock curling again." Holy crap, this makes me want to watch more curling.

"I heard the refs were paid off by ... Gay Democrats? I don't know. Who do we not like?"

Wow. Didn't this happen to baseball? Right about when they lost a whole bunch of fans to hockey? Greedy dumbasses, all.

"They're going to burn the city of Detroit down if the Pistons win, and it's not worth it." Hah! It'd only be an improvement!